Weekend Review…

By Monica on October 9th, 2007

Instead of using my long ‘holiday’ weekend to cook up new elaborate feasts, I opted to make several easy, snackie foods that we could eat whilst lounging on the couch catching up on movies. So much for productivity!

I always thought eggs were disgusting and would rarely eat them unless disguised in baked goods, so giving up eggs was a snap even though I have hens which lay the most gorgeous brown and blue eggs! Nevertheless, in my omni-days, about once a year I would make egg salad. This satisfies that craving quite well!

Your Basic Eggless Egg Salad
1 block extra firm tofu, dried well and crumbled
1 small red onion, finely diced
1 stalk celery, finely diced
3/4 cup Vegenaise
1/4 cup pickle relish
2T mustard
2t dried dill
1t taragon
pinch of cayenne pepper

Then we moved on to Jess’s Sick Soup, which is truly delicious. I omitted the mushrooms as usual, but added a handful of green beans and sugar snap peas. This is definitely a recipe I’ll make again, and it’s a great excuse to eat more crusty Italian bread (like I need an excuse, I’m a carb addict.)

And finally, blueberry pancakes. I always make too many pancakes, which I think are disgusting reheated, so the dogs typically get a breakfast treat on pancake day. They enjoyed the pancakes thoroughly!

Cranberry Walnut Pumpkin Bread

By Monica on October 5th, 2007

It’s the obligatory October pumpkin post! Truth be told, I found 1 pound bags of fresh cranberries at the grocery store reduced to 25¢. Don’t look at me like that; you know you would have purchased a dozen bags too.

2 cups whole cranberries, coarsely chopped
1/2 cup chopped walnuts
1 1/2 cups flour
1/4 cornmeal
3/4 cup sugar
1/4t salt
1t baking soda
1/4t baking powder
1/2t ground ginger
1/2t cinnamon
1/2t ground cloves
1 cup canned pumpkin puree
5T vegetable oil
3T water

Preheat oven to 350°F.

Mix the flour, cornmeal, sugar, salt, baking soda, baking powder, cinnamon, ginger, and cloves. In another large bowl, mix the pumpkin, oil, and water. Gradually stir the dry ingredients into the wet, mixing well. Add the chopped cranberries and walnuts.

Pour mixture into a lightly greased loaf pan, and bake for 55 minutes.

Seitan Kabob

By Monica on October 4th, 2007

Some people are hard pressed to pick a favorite meal, they hem and haw between a handful of old standbys or cannot possibly even narrow it down that far. Not me. This has been my absolute favorite meal ever since I can remember. This is the one food I must have if stranded on that hypothetical deserted island. Before I cover up the grill for winter, I had to get one more Seitan Kabob dinner in.

For those of you who get creeped out by faux meat tasting “too real”, be forewarned that most omnis I’ve fed this to cannot tell the difference between the seitan and sirloin. For those of you who enjoyed the taste and texture of beef in your days of carniv-yore, you’ll love it. This is not your bland, average shish kabob by any stretch of the imagination!

Kabobs
8 oz. seitan, cut into 1″ chunks
3-4 bell peppers, quartered
6-8 small yellow onions, or 4 large onions quartered

Marinade
1 cup vegetable oil
1 cup white vinegar
2t salt
1/2t pepper
4t dry mustard
2T garlic salt
4T A1 sauce (yes, it’s vegan)
4t vegetarian Worcestershire sauce

In a large bowl, combine all marinade ingredients. Add the seitan cubes, peppers, and onions, making sure seitan is submerged in marinade. Cover and let marinate in the refrigerator as long as you can stand it, I highly recommend 3 days!

Drain the seitan, peppers, and onions, reserving the marinade. Skewer them and grill until seitan is nicely charred on all sides, and onions are cooked throughout.

Pour marinade into a large saucepan and heat. When marinade is warm, remove seitan, peppers, and onions from skewers and add to the saucepan. Serve over rice with plenty of ‘juice’!

Who Eats This?

By Monica on October 3rd, 2007

There is one particular episode of the Henry Rollins Show which echoes my daily life in rural America, where residents practically had a parade in honor of the new Super Walmart opening: In a “Drawing Conclusions” piece, Henry takes on Walmart and its expansive stock of Guns and Ammo magazines and Nascar tees. At one point a scene shows two elderly workers trying to hoist a “75 pound bag of Chips Ahoy” onto a shelf and he yells in that disgusted Henry Rollins tone, “Who eats this shit?!”

Thus, “Who eats this shit?!” has become a popular catch phrase in my household and when this dandy Walmart photo opportunity presented itself, I couldn’t resist.

Yes, that is a 25 pound bucket of lard. Seriously, if you are not Paula Dean, what do you do with 25 pounds of rendered pig fat? A little Googling taught me that the bucket Ray is holding contains 105,000 calories and 11,200 grams of saturated fat. Not only that, but as the bucket proudly proclaims, it is preserved with BHA and propyl gallate, everyone’s favorite carcinogenic preservatives! It’s like an old bucket of paint touting it’s extraordinarily high lead content. Brilliant, ConAgra Foods!

Alright, since Bazu and Mihl enjoyed the previous picture so much, I thought I’d add the second photo we took that day. Juvenile and immature? Absolutely! For some reason, Walmart has that effect on me. Here is my husband. Kissing. The bucket. Of lard.